Daniel Goleman explains why emotional intelligence is more important than high IQ for our success, virtue, and happiness in life.

Former New York Times science author and Harvard psychologist Daniel Goleman explains why emotional intelligence can serve as a more important critical success factor than high IQ for our virtue, peace, joy, happiness, and fulfillment in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship.

Daniel Goleman (2005)

Emotional intelligence: why EQ can matter more than IQ

 

Former New York Times popular science author and Harvard clinical psychologist Daniel Goleman describes, discusses, and delves into why emotional intelligence serves as a more important critical success factor than high IQ for our virtue, peace, happiness, and even fulfillment in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. Goleman introduces many millions of readers worldwide to the rare unique concept of emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence refers to the combination of 5 key positive personality traits as well as psychological skills, talents, core competences, and dynamic capabilities: self-awareness, mood control, motivation, empathy, and better interpersonal relationship management. Goleman suggests that these skills combine to account for more than 80% of success in life. Further, high IQ is not a guarantee of success, virtue, peace, joy, and fulfillment in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. Although many people learn these 5 key psychological skills in childhood, many adults can still learn to apply these practical skills, talents, core competences, and dynamic capabilities to build better personal growth advances, social habits, team mindsets, inclusive worldviews, and interpersonal relationships. In essence, our new emotionally intelligent insights, actions, and behaviors remake, reshape, and reinforce several other keystone habits, growth mindsets, hard truths, worldviews, and positive patterns in iterative continuous improvements through life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship.

 

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IQ contributes to less than 20% of all life success, and the other 80% of life success arises from better, bolder, brighter, and broader social relations and achievements in emotional intelligence, or EQ, in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. With emotional intelligence, the 5 key positive personality traits, skills, talents, core competences, and dynamic capabilities are self-awareness, mood control, internal motivation, empathy, and social relationship management. People use, apply, and leverage 2 different complementary minds. The first mind thinks in terms of rational thoughts, insights, and many other ideas, and the second mind feels with dramatic human emotions. These 2 different complementary parts and regions of the human brain often operate independently. Strong, intense, fervent, powerful, and dramatic human emotions interfere with clear rational thoughts, prescient insights, and other ideas. Specifically, fears, dreads, worries, and anxieties undermine the intellectual mind. In our modern life journey, it is vital for us to find a delicate intelligent balance between reason and passion. Many people experience the natural flow of thoughts, insights, and other new ideas, when these people fully engage themselves in some specific tasks, missions, and activities. Such specific tasks, missions, and activities often better fit their emotional intelligence profiles, skills, talents, core competences, intellectual interests, dynamic capabilities, and personal preferences in due course. For this reason, it is imperative for most people to apply their emotional intelligence as a cost-effective tool for time management. In the modern management science, prescient feedback is the common corporate currency of emotional intelligence. In life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship, the ultimate success of a team of experts is proportional to their complete emotional intelligence. The high IQ of each individual contributor explains no, little, and minimal variation in team performance. Good team chemistry requires emotionally intelligent questions, answers, insights, actions, solutions, and interactions. These team interactions often relate to the key personal mastery of the 5 major components of emotional intelligence. In summary, our emotionally intelligent questions, answers, insights, ideas, actions, behaviors, and interactions remake, reshape, and reinforce many other growth mindsets, hard truths, keystone habits, worldviews, and iterative continuous improvements in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship.

 

In our increasingly inclusive global human society, we cannot agree with the fiction: all our human actions, efforts, and decisions are completely due to pure rationality, devoid of human emotions, because we often feel many different thoughts, insights, concerns, and emotions in our day-to-day lives, jobs, studies, research endeavors, and even spiritual pursuits. We feel a wide variety of human emotions about almost all aspects of life, business, innovation, and even entrepreneurship. We think; we learn; we forget; we remember; we imagine; and we feel all kinds of emotions about everything. From week to week, we weave together thoughts, insights, worldviews, actions, and behaviors with human emotions. The common human emotions span fear, disgust, surprise, anger, sadness, contempt, peace, joy, trust, and happiness. Goleman draws a distinction between IQ and EQ: these personality traits, talents, and skills are not opposite core competences, but alternatively, separate dynamic capabilities. This split approximates the common folk distinction between head and heart. When a person knows something is right and correct with no flaws in his or her heart, this knowledge is a different order of conviction with a deeper degree of certainty. Indeed, this knowledge differs from the same thought in the rational mind. This strong sense of rightness lurks deep in the body and hence serves as part of a steady background flow of human emotions throughout the day. In practice, the rational mind is often slower than emotional mind. The former takes a few moments to process all vital relevant information, whereas, the latter springs into actions with no pause. With these 2 complementary minds, we learn to keep a delicate balance between reason and passion.

 

From day to day, we send emotional cues, colors, and signals in every encounter. These emotional cues, colors, and signals affect our family and friends, coworkers, leaders, teammates, and even strangers. When we apply emotional intelligence at its best, we are able to enter the new normal steady state of a natural flow of ideas, thoughts, insights, lessons, worldviews, actions, decisions, and behaviors. The key flow empowers us to immerse ourselves in creative, optimal, and impactful actions, pursuits, and experiences. During this key flow, we enjoy with intense mental focus what we try to accomplish in due time. Good examples of flow experiences include reading a novel, writing a book, composing music, coding a new software solution, playing a sport, and painting a portrait. A sense of accomplishment, or warm glow, often serves as the intrinsic reward for each of these flow experiences.

 

In terms of biological design for the basic neural circuitry of human emotions, our innate personality traits, skills, talents, key competences, and dynamic capabilities represent what worked best for the last 5,000 human generations. In this long-term view, we grow, learn, succeed, fail, refocus, evolve, and adapt in response to many external life circumstances, vicissitudes, episodes, and scenarios. We can all learn to master the 5 common components of emotional intelligence for personal growth advances, growth mindsets, hard truths, keystone habits, worldviews, and iterative continuous improvements in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. In a positive light, we bounce back better to bring brighter intelligence to our emotions, civility to our streets, motivation to our ventures, and empathy to our communities. When we learn to be more mindful, careful, and aware of our personal flaws, faults, failures, mistakes, setbacks, obstacles, difficulties, and disappointments, we apply a good, unique, and positive sense of humor for better self-care to achieve iterative continuous improvements in our social habits and personal growth mindsets. After all, tomorrow is another day. Through our life journey, we should learn to carry out emotionally intelligent insights, actions, responses, and solutions to help enrich the modern lives of others.

 

The 5 common components of emotional intelligence span self-awareness, mood control, internal motivation, empathy, and interpersonal relationship management. The personal mastery of all these 5 common components of emotional intelligence is vital to our personal growth advances, social habits, team mindsets, worldviews, and interpersonal relations.

In recent years, social psychologists delve into the key biological design for human emotions and personality traits. These studies show that genetic profiles determine some but not all of the varieties of human emotions and personality traits. However, these studies raise 2 additional questions: What can we change about ourselves? Why do some intelligent people flail, fail, and founder, while less intelligent people prosper? The answers reside within the rare, unique, and positive array of dynamic capabilities in relation to emotional intelligence.

 

Evolution gave humankind emotions to help people cope with dangerous situations. These human emotions empower many people to act fast in the face of peril. Many modern people retain the emotional system of their ancestors, who regularly faced life-or-death struggles, scenarios, situations, and episodes from day to day. In our modern human society, these emotions often overwhelm logical thoughts, insights, ideas, actions, responses, and behaviors. In a real sense, every person has 2 key minds. The first mind thinks logically with sharp insights and ideas, and the second mind feels human emotions. Also, the first mind thinks with reason, and the second mind feels with passion. The first rational mind lets each person ponder in her head, and the second emotional mind allows each person to react to outside cues, colors, and signals with fast furious hunches, instincts, and impulses in her heart. Such 2 minds tend to work in harmony. However, human hunches, instincts, and emotions sometimes allow the second emotional mind to dominate the first rational mind.

 

The human brain’s centers of emotions evolved first. The limbic system surrounds the brainstem and serves as the key center of passionate emotions. The brainstem affects human memory and the innate ability to learn new concepts, insights, and ideas. In essence, the limbic system affects, controls, and regulates core emotions, motives, actions, and other behavioral responses. Later, the neocortex evolved to help the brain think logically with reason. Subsequently, the amygdala grew on the sides of the brain. Specifically, these pairwise structures often serve as the central storehouses of old and new emotional memories. The amygdala gives our modern life emotional value, passion, and intrinsic motivation. In a severe and acute crisis, the amygdala reacts almost instantly and far faster than the neocortex; hence, this emotional brain behaves and sometimes reacts independently of the rational brain. The amygdala lends extra weight to both recent and distant memories of emotional arousal. These biological marks allow us to retain vivid memories of both pleasure and danger.

 

While the amygdala pushes us to respond to outside cues, colors, and signals, the neocortex works likes a damper. Specifically, this cortex stifles, dampens, controls, and regulates our human emotions. When some new potential threat overrides our rational thoughts, insights, and ideas, this new threat disproportionately triggers a fast furious reaction in response. In this rare unique situation, the amygdala quickly activates the fight-or-flight and life-or-death response before the prefrontal cortex can properly assess the same situation. In this special case, the threat emotionally hijacks the emotional brain to prompt a quick knee-jerk reaction without any further conscious thought. When the amygdala triggers this impulsive reaction, the cortex fails to control this reaction and its concomitant emotions. These strong emotions can sometimes interfere with our short attention span and each aspect of our clear rational mind. Instead of trying to suppress these emotions, we should strive to find an intelligent balance between reason and passion.

 

Our social skills and emotionally intelligent solutions account for more than 80% of success in life. Also, higher IQ is not a guarantee of success, virtue, and happiness in modern life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. Many common positive emotions help us better cope with rare hard times of setbacks, failures, obstacles, difficulties, and disappointments. These positive emotions include hope, joy, love, awe, peace, interest, gratitude, amusement, and inspiration. Emotionally intelligent people use, apply, and leverage these common positive emotions to enhance self-care and intrinsic motivation. We should learn to draw a distinction between IQ and EQ: these social skills, talents, and positive personality traits are not opposite core competences, but alternatively, separate dynamic capabilities. Often a person can be intellectually brilliant but emotionally inept. This imbalance can cause many life problems in social relationships.

 

Yale University president and social psychologist Peter Salovey defines the 5 core components of emotional intelligence as self-awareness, mood control, motivation, empathy, and positive relationship management. Self-awareness calls for careful, close, intense, and meticulous attention to internal states, especially hidden ideas, thoughts, motives, and emotions. Sound, good, and efficient mood control requires coping with fears, dreads, worries, anxieties, and many other negative emotions in our modern life journey. Sometimes we should focus on intrinsic motivation, rather than extrinsic validation, in order to achieve several different goals in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. Also, we should apply our rare unique sense of empathy to better care for others. In this new light, empathy helps us better connect with others in a similar situation. We should better manage our social relationships with others. The personal mastery of all these 5 common components of emotional intelligence is vital to our interpersonal relationships.

 

Self-awareness calls for close, careful, intense, and meticulous attention to internal states, especially hidden motives, thoughts, insights, ideas, and emotions.

Human emotions are often hidden. Emotional self-awareness often requires sharp, close, and careful attention to a person’s internal states such as hidden and ulterior motives, thoughts, ideas, and emotions. This self-awareness serves as the neutral state for better self-reflection even during intense emotions. Social psychologists refer to this self-awareness as the simple acknowledgement of our mood, thoughts about our mood, and other emotions. For practical purposes, such self-awareness relates to our broader ability to change our mood at a given point in time. Emotions can be both conscious and unconscious. These emotions tend to begin before we become rationally aware of them. Conscious emotions find expression in our words, actions, and behaviors. Further, unconscious emotions can cause powerful ripple effects on our thoughts, motives, ideas, and reactions even though we may not be aware of these hidden emotions. When we manage to become conscious of these hidden emotions, we are able to better control these emotions in time. Therefore, self-awareness serves as the foundation for better managing emotions. Such self-awareness is vitally important for us to shake off bad mood in hard times of stress and adversity. By better understanding our own hidden motives, emotions, needs, drives, strengths, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities, we remain both aware and alert to alternative worldviews, insights, lessons, reasons, and explanations for several life events. Self-awareness is all about recognizing how our emotions influence our thoughts, views, actions, reactions, and behaviors, as well as how others perceive us in the broader social context.

 

Sound, good, and efficient mood control requires coping with fears, dreads, worries, anxieties, and many other negative emotions through the modern life journey.

Even since the ancient Greeks, people have seen self-mastery and the skill, talent, and ability to withstand emotional storms as a virtue. However, life without passion would be dull, tedious, and monotonous. It is our full-time job to control our mood. From work to recreation, many human tasks, missions, and activities are our own attempts to manage mood in a cost-effective way. We should learn to bounce back better to balance the background hum of human emotions. One of our most basic and essential psychological skills pertains to the art of soothing intense emotional surges. Through our conscious efforts, behavioral changes, and even medications, we can exert control over the duration of intense human emotions.

 

One of the most difficult emotions is rage, because anger often energizes and even exhilarates us to take actions. Rage can last for hours with a hair-trigger state, and this mental state further provokes us. If someone is edgy and some external event triggers a second emotional onslaught, the new hair-trigger state can be especially intense. A good way for people to cool off from anger involves seeking distractions. Going off alone helps people cool off from anger, so does exercise. Other intense emotions such as sadness and bereavement can alleviate rage, but these negative emotions raise the risk of full-blown depression. To break bad cycles of depression, psychotherapists instruct people to challenge the depressive thoughts themselves. These depressive thoughts often turn out to be false beliefs. In addition, therapists often find it useful to schedule some pleasant distractions as a healthy replacement for the depressive thoughts. These pleasant distractions often involve having some sensual treats, playing sports, accomplishing some small tasks, helping others in need, and reaching out through prayers. It is powerful for us to cognitively reframe the same sad situation in a more positive light.  

 

We should focus on our internal motivation, rather than external validation, in order to achieve many different goals in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship.

By contrast to external validation, positive internal motivation can often serve as a better catalyst for achievement. From Michael Jordan and Stephen Curry to Mozart, Chopin, and Beethoven, the greatest athletes, musicians, and chess masters stick with arduous practice early in life from year to year. Intense human emotions help determine how well people attain their respective goals in life, business, innovation, and even entrepreneurship. Intense emotions substantially enhance or reduce the capacity to apply innate talents, skills, core competences, and dynamic capabilities. Another critical life skill pertains to the innate ability for people to delay gratification with almost no, few, and minimal emotions.

 

Starbucks’s core cultural values and rules for employees inculcate the key concept of willpower. As some research studies show, this key concept of willpower serves as the pre-eminent habit for broader personal success. Just as academic scholars achieve positive results in many other non-academic aspects of their modern lives when they meticulously practice self-discipline and persistence, Starbucks workers improve their own lives, careers, and relationships after they learn the willpower of remaining cheerful regardless of what crops up in their workdays. This key positive willpower is evocative of the famous marshmallow experiment. In the marshmallow experiments, psychologists told little children they could have a marshmallow right away, or they could have 2 marshmallows if they waited 15 minutes alone with the treat in front of them. In the subsequent years, the children who were able to wait for one more marshmallow proved to be substantially more successful throughout their elementary school, secondary school, college, and even the first ever job after college. Specifically, these children were able to apply their self-regulatory skills to delay gratification at a young age. By the same token, people can learn willpower as effectively as they make conscious efforts to learn to play a musical instrument, speak a foreign language, or adapt to many changes in external circumstances of life. Once people master willpower, they should continue to practice applying and improving their willpower, self-discipline, and perseverance, as they would work to exercise daily to keep their muscles firm, fit, brawny, active, and athletic in shape.

 

Fears, dreads, worries, and anxieties undermine intellectual pursuits. However, a good mood often significantly improves these intellectual pursuits. People who are adept at harnessing their emotions can even use their fears, dreads, worries, and anxieties for internal motivation. Experts describe the relationship between anxiety and performance as an upside-down U-turn. Too much anxiety impairs intellectual performance. Too little anxiety means minimum motivation and poor performance. Peak performance comes in the middle. A mildly gleeful state of hypomania tends to be ideal for writers, playwrights, composers, and other creative artists. Creative anxiety often breeds creative desperation for some time. At this rare unique stage, these creative minds make, achieve, and accomplish revolutionary state-of-the-art advances, discoveries, disruptive innovations, and other tech-savvy developments. Disney’s blockbuster animation movie Frozen is a good example of applying some degree of creative anxiety to reach the internal state of creative desperation, all in support of the next major disruptive innovation. Former New York Times journalist, author, and Pulitzer Prize winner Charles Duhigg describes this internal motivation in his recent bestseller: Smarter Faster Better.

 

Hope, faith, love, and optimism play powerful roles in human productivity advances. These positive emotions mean never giving up and not giving in to negativism and depression despite setbacks, failures, obstacles, difficulties, and disappointments. Lifelong learners need to maintain the expectation that everything will turn out well. With high hopes, optimists often attribute their setbacks and failures to a few forces, factors, and key elements under control. These optimists think they can still change their thoughts, words, actions, habits, and behaviors. For this reason, the optimists never fall into the rabbit hole of depression whenever they motivate themselves to confront the brutal facts, setbacks, and failures. In modern finance, CEO optimism serves as a good, positive, and emotionally intelligent attitude for better operational performance in the broader business world. Hope, faith, love, and optimism often combine to support the self-efficacy belief that we have personal mastery over our life events, results, outcomes, and new challenges for better self-improvement and personal growth.

 

Psychologists identify a rare, unique, and positive peak-performance internal state, the flow experience, and this flow experience arises from the best use of emotional intelligence. In this flow experience, we completely engage our hearts, minds, and souls in some tasks, missions, and activities. With stellar skills, we enjoy the work so much that we fully immerse ourselves in applying our innate talents in light of a bigger, bolder, brighter, and broader long-term vision, social good, or life purpose. This flow experience often arrives in the sweet spot between boredom and creative anxiety. Through this flow experience, we feel many positive emotions such as joy, love, awe, peace, interest, gratitude, and inspiration. Emotionally intelligent people use, apply, and leverage these common positive emotions to further enhance self-care, self-efficacy, and internal motivation. In this flow experience, the human brain becomes calmer. This unique brain feature empowers us to complete intellectually hectic, hard, tough, and formidable tasks, missions, and activities with minimal time, effort, and energy.

 

We should apply our chosen rare unique sense of empathy to better care for others. In this new light, empathy helps us better connect with others in a similar situation.  

As we become more self-aware of our thoughts, words, actions, insights, emotions, and behaviors, we tend to be more skillful at reading the emotions of others. In this rare unique fashion, we become more sensitive to how people feel about our words, actions, and interpersonal interactions. In relation to emotional intelligence, rapport and friendship combine to serve as the central roots of caring for others, and these social skills, keystone habits, and personal growth advances arise from the greater human capacity for empathy. Those people who are substantially better at reading the emotions of others tend to be more mature, more likeable, more sociable, more sensitive, and more popular.

 

Empathy often begins in infancy with attunement, or a form of non-verbal physical resemblance between the child and parents. Attunement often reassures the infant and makes it feel substantially closer, better, and greater emotional attachment to the parents. This attunement requires feeling calm enough to be able to read subtle non-verbal cues, colors, and social signals from others.

 

Empathy plays a major role in both understanding and responding to the emotions of others. People who empathize with others recognize, understand, and share the emotions of others in some similar scenarios, situations, and many other life events and episodes. As one of the 5 core components of emotional intelligence, empathy entails putting ourselves in their shoes. At a deeper social level, empathy requires not only recognizing another person’s emotional state, but also understanding why this person experiences some specific emotions. Empathy often empowers people to better understand different views, opinions, and perspectives. This social ability allows people to build better and deeper relationships by better understanding and responding to the emotions of others with much stronger social ties, networks, and connections. Specifically, people who empathize with others substantially improve social communication simply by listening to different worldviews, perspectives, and even disagreements. In practice, this critical step often helps prevent unnecessary social stereotypes, mistakes, misperceptions, and misinterpretations. With greater empathy, people can better navigate through many dynamic power imbalances in social networks, relationships, and interactions.

 

Finally, empathy is not simply sympathy. Sympathy involves feeling sorry for others. Instead, empathy involves more deeply sharing, understanding, and responding to the emotions of others. In effect, empathy empowers people to engage in effective, compassionate, and sensitive social networks, dialogues, and interactions.

 

We should better manage our interpersonal relationships with others. The personal mastery of all the 5 mainstream components of emotional intelligence is vital to our interpersonal relationships.

Our rare unique ability to express a broad variety of human emotions is one of the mainstream keystone social habits, growth mindsets, and core competences in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship. Specifically, emotions are contagious. People often send, forward, and transmit many emotional cues, colors, and signals in social networks, relationships, and interactions. Further, people subconsciously mimic and imitate the keystone social habits, growth mindsets, and other emotions that others emanate through social interactions. Highly effective people often send social signals, worldviews, and emotions to motivate others to take specific actions. As people interact, they often mirror each other’s words, thoughts, body languages, and other non-verbal gestures. When people show this social synchrony, they tend to share similar emotions. This common social coordination is the adult version of infant-parent attunement. In fact, this social synchrony serves as a key determinant of effective interpersonal communication. We can make our best conscious efforts to sense the emotions of others. At the same time, we can attempt to learn to better control the emotional signals that we send through social interactions. This social synchrony helps us better influence people in a good way. This better interpersonal relationship management serves as another fundamental aspect of high emotional intelligence.

 

In modern business management, it is vital for team players to learn to apply better emotional intelligence to avoid subpar social outcomes from low employee morale and poor communication from senior leadership to inadequate team compensation, psychological safety, warm-glow recognition, and a lack of work-life balance, trust, and transparency. In the broader team context, prescient feedback is the common corporate currency of emotional intelligence. From week to week, senior managers should provide honest, candid, and prescient feedback to all of the team members, individual contributors, and other subject matter experts. Also, these team players should share similar feedback among themselves with great emotional intelligence. In most cases, these team players should not misconstrue such feedback as some unfair criticism, as a personal attack, or both. In our new global economy with many knowledge workers, it is vital for senior leaders to apply the critical concept of the group EQ. In life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship, the ultimate success of a team of experts is proportional to their overall emotional intelligence. The high IQ of each individual contributor explains almost no, little, and minimal variation in team performance. Good team chemistry requires emotionally intelligent questions, answers, insights, solutions, and interactions. These team interactions often relate to the personal mastery of the 5 common components of emotional intelligence. In essence, our emotionally intelligent questions, answers, insights, lessons, actions, behaviors, and interactions remake, reshape, and reinforce several other keystone social habits, hard truths, growth mindsets, and iterative continuous improvements in life, business, innovation, and entrepreneurship.

 

In marriages, emotionally intelligent questions, answers, insights, lessons, actions, and solutions help better balance the personal tensions between men and women. In most cases, men and women tend to learn different social habits and emotional skills through childhood. Harsh, severe, and unfair criticisms are the major warning signs of trouble in a marriage. For harmony, both men and women should learn to criticize an action without personally attacking the person who commits this action. Personal attacks leave people feeling angry, shameful, and defensive. Sometimes personal attacks can even trigger fight-or-flight actions, responses, and behaviors.

 

Recent research studies of both toddlers and teenagers show a general decline in their emotional health across many parts and regions of the world. This mega trend reflects widespread withdrawal, anxiety, depression, attention disorders, and many delinquent behaviors. For this reason, psychologists and psychotherapists suggest that people should learn the 5 common components of emotional intelligence at a young age. In addition, some recent medical studies show that the emotional brain closely connects to the immune system. Stress makes people more susceptible to infectious diseases. Anger, rage, and hostility cause hypertension, diabetes, heart diseases, and even Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s diseases. Fears, dreads, worries, anxieties and many other negative emotions are toxic, harmful, and detrimental to our physical health. Relaxation exercises often prove to be a good countermeasure. Simply talking about our problems helps enhance our immune system by reducing stress in a biological sense. Doctors should be aware that good mood control is an effective alternative form of disease prevention. Patients better recover from their diseases, disorders, and symptoms when these patients feel better with less stress, meet their psychological needs, and experience positive emotions. In our inclusive global society, honest, candid, and prescient feedback now serves as the common corporate currency of emotional intelligence. In this positive light, EQ and IQ have both become major determinants of our overall literacy in the new world order and global knowledge economy.

 

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